Meeting the Parents
by Blues32
Summary: It's something everyone has to do in a relationship. Unfortunately, it's also something people dread doing. Starfire is insisting on meeting Batman and Arella is being equally insistant. Oh well. How bad could it be, right? Multiple pairings. R/R.
1. Disclaimer

DISCLAIMER

DISCLAIMER.

I do not own Teen Titans. If I did, there would be a season six. Teen Titans belong to DC Comics. I hold no claim over ANYTHING in this story that could provide money…because if I did, I wouldn't need to get up at four thirty in the morning. This topic was bound to come up. I would have included Terra meeting Beast Boy's parents or vise versa but Terra already met Doom Patrol and went through Beast Boy's photo album. Anyway, I read somewhere that Batman didn't like Starfire for some reason, so I carried that over to this story. You may notice again that I'm calling Robin "Richard" again, despite having stories in the past that have called him "Tim". Consider it a recon. Hell, if DC can do it, so can I. Just pretend that some super strong guy started punching the walls or reality again or something. Thanks for reading and I hopes you review!


	2. Chapter 1

32 Productions Presents…

**32 Productions Presents…**

A Teen Titan Fan FictionThe Teen Titans in…

"**Meeting the Parents"**

**Chapter One**

**Azarath**

Azarath had been destroyed, this is true…yet somehow it was still possible to visit it. Perhaps Azarath is now simply a state of mind. Perhaps, much like Earth itself, the other dimension had repaired itself after Trigon's defeat. Who was to say? Raven had tried asking and nobody would tell her. Stupid monks and their mysterious ways… Raven was snapped out of her thoughts by the clearing of a throat. She glanced up at the bemused woman before her. It was her mother, naturally. She had little reason to return to Azarath besides that. She had no friends in Azarath, she wasn't allowed to have them. Her mother wasn't even allowed to talk to her for the longest time. It was…an awkward relationship to be sure. In fact, it was that very reason that she was so late with what she was planning to do.

Raven: Um…happy belated Mother's Day.

Raven's voice was filled with the usual discomfort she felt when she spoke to her mother. It was hard…accepting that there was someone who loved her unconditionally…who had loved her since before Raven had any real thoughts in her mind. Not before her birth, mind you. No, Raven was certain her mother despised her at that point…but afterwards, yes. For her part, Arella took Raven's behavior in stride, seeming almost amused by her efforts. Strange…Raven felt that she would act the same way. Obviously she had inherited more then just the physical aspects from Arella. In any case, Raven handed her a small box, covered in wrapping paper. The paper was plain; a simple blue coloring, no patterns at all. Arella took the box, smiling. It was never a big smile either. Not like Starfire's beaming grins. Just a tiny smile that spoke volumes somehow.

Arella: Thank you, Raven. I'm touched you bothered this year.

Raven: Things are noticeably different, A…Mother.

Raven was use to addressing Arella by name. It was to serve as another means of preventing emotional attachment on either of their parts. Now it no longer mattered. Arella nodded in response to her curt comment and removed the wrapping paper, then opening the box. Inside was a comb. It was, however, not just some plastic comb. Rather it seemed to be made of…

Arella: Is this silver?

Raven: (muttering) No. It's platinum. I thought that…you know, you have long hair and…well… (normal) I…I know it's an odd gift. I can take it back if you want.

Arella: No, no. I love it. It's very beautiful. Though I don't think it was meant to actually be used.

Raven sighed, shaking her head.

Raven: I told Shade that, but he insisted that no one would make a comb you didn't comb with.

Arella: Who?

Crap.

Raven: Uh…well, he's…uh…one of my teammates. Yeah. Named Shade.

Another smile tugged at Arella's lips.

Arella: You're blushing, Raven.

She pulled her hood up. Double crap.

Raven: I am not.

Arella: Raven, believe it or not, I was once a teenager. I know that stammer. He's your boyfriend, isn't he?

Triple frickin' crap. Raven rubbed her arm nervously.

Raven: (mumbling) Yes, Mother.

Arella: A nice boy, I hope.

Raven: (mumbling still) Depends on who you are.

Arella: How long have you been with him?

Raven: (mumbling) Almost a year…I think.

Time flies, you know. Arella's expression darkened slightly.

Arella: He hasn't tried to…

Raven: No! He wouldn't DO that!

Her outburst caught Arella by surprise. Raven was offended that she would even suggest that. As one might expect, Arella was a bit…wary of men. When your partner suddenly morphs into an image of pure evil given flesh, it tends to leave a mark on the psyche.

Arella: You feel rather strongly for him, I see.

Raven: …yes.

Arella clasped her hands together.

Arella: Alright then. I want to meet him.

Quadruple fing crap!

:CUE THEME:

**Azarath Still**

Raven's jaw hung open in surprise. Arella shrugged.

Arella: Together for a year? I think I'm entitled to meet him, don't you think?

Raven: B…but he…um…well, you see…

Think, Raven…THINK! Raven closed her eyes.

Raven: _Help me, you dolts! THINK!_

Pink: _I wish we had a pony._

Raven wished she had a taser to shock that thought out of her brain.

Raven: _Not helping!_

Gray: _Just give up…she's your mom. You can't say no to your mom._

Green: _The hell she can't! Stand up to her, dammit! It's your life!_

Red: _**Tear off her legs and cram them down her throat!**_

Raven winced.

Raven: _How would THAT help?!_

Red: _**Help? …uh…well, she…I just don't like her, damn it all! I don't like anyone! Pink, get my cloak out of your mrfing mouth!**_

Raven: _Yellow, PLEASE!_

Yellow: _He IS injured._

And he was. He still hadn't healed from the beating Beast Boy gave him under the influence of that alien.

Raven: I would, Mother, but he wouldn't exactly be talkative. His jaw is wired shut. It got broken not long ago and he's still healing up.  
Arella: I see. Must be hard to talk with him.

Raven: Oh, not really. We have a mental link that…damnation, you tricked me!

Raven realized that as soon as that smile returned to her mother's face. Raven sighed.

Raven: Alright, alright. …I'll bring him in maybe…three days.

Arella: Excellent. I'll make apple sauce for him.

Raven grumbled. Now her mother was trying to be funny.

Raven: …add cinnamon. He's sick of the plain stuff.

Arella: Now, I want to hear all about him.

Of course she did. Raven was up to sextuple crap by now.

Raven: …well…he's…um…different.

Arella: Different. Everyone's different, Raven. I'm different, your different…

Raven: I mean more like MY kind of different then compared to yours, Mother. There are degrees of different. He and I are on the further end of the spectrum.

Arella: How'd you meet?

Raven: He was hunting for his psychopathic sister.

Arella: I'm not liking how this is starting.

Raven: He's a good person, Mother! He just has…issues.

**Titan Tower: Main Room**

Shade forced the hotdog against his teeth again, trying to get it to somehow pass between his teeth like a strainer. Sonovabitch! He wanted MEAT, damn it! Hmm…maybe if he… About five minutes later, Cyborg entered and found the walls covered in…something. Shade was also covered…in fact, he had more then the walls on him.

Cyborg: …oookay. What happened?

Sighing, Shade held up the hotdog pack and pointed to the blender. Cyborg smacked himself in the forehead.

Cyborg: Okay…I'm not going to ask why you put hotdogs in the blender…but you got to put the lid on it, man.

Shade: Reres a rid?!

It's hard to talk when your jaw is wired shut. I guess that goes without saying, doesn't it? Cyborg rolled his eye (the other one doesn't roll, it being a red lens and all).

Cyborg: You're cleaning this up, you know.

Shade hung his head. Yes, the instant it started to spray in every direction, Shade knew he'd be cleaning for a while.

Cyborg: Sponge is under the sink.

Cyborg decided he'd rather not be in the room while he was cleaning, so he left. Shade groaned. He hated cleaning. …so he created shadows to do it for him. See? He's not a COMPLETE idiot!

**Raven's Room**

Raven reappeared in her room. Since Azarath's return, the process of going there had become a lot less metaphysical and a lot more normal…physical. Since she was born in Azarath (though technically NOT an Azarathian since her mother was from Gotham) her body was in tuned to it. She could easily travel from one dimension to another through sheer will. In theory, she should be able to transport others as well. I mean, if she couldn't, how would she have gotten the present over? Or her clothes? Sighing, Raven unfolded her legs and stepped outside her room. She would check the main room first, then Shade's room. …obviously she was looking for him. Starfire floated up next to her.

Starfire: Raven, you have returned from your home dimension! How was your visit with your mother?

Raven: Awkward. I let it slip that I'm dating. Now she wants to meet Shade.

Starfire shrugged, landing and keeping step with Raven as she walked.

Starfire: What is so bad about that?

Raven: Starfire, trust me. You wouldn't want to meet Robin's dad. Shade isn't going to…

Starfire: Raven!

She lowered her voice, looking upset.

Starfire: Robin's parents have passed on, you are aware of this.

Raven: Yes. I am. In fact, I knew before you did. Tha…

Starfire: WHAT?! How is it that…?

Raven: Starfire, calm down. I was in his head, remember? I saw things. Anyway, I'm not talking about his biological father. I'm talking about Batman.

Starfire stepped in front of Raven, hands on her hips.

Starfire: And why, pray tell, would I not wish to meet him?

Raven: He's the Batman. That's why. Dressed like a bat, for absolutely no reason at all…that's just a sign of a lack of sanity, Starfire. Think about it. If you dress like an animal, you're either in possession of power similar TO that animal…or you're nuts.

Starfire wasn't happy about hearing this. Granted, she never met the Batman, but she was sure he was a fine man! After all, Robin turned out so well, didn't he? Not a single problem (cough cough, obsessive, cough). Starfire huffed.

Starfire: Very well. I shall prove you are mistaken, Raven.

Raven: …er…about what, exactly?

Starfire: That I would not want to meet the Batman.

Raven: I think the act of saying you DO already does prove me wrong.

Starfire: …oh. Yes, it does…

Starfire thought a moment.

Starfire: Very well, I wish to prove that I am simply not saying that I would like to meet him.

Raven: Ah. Well, that makes more sense. Well, alright…but don't say I didn't warn you. I've never met the man myself…and I really don't think I want to. He seems a bit too…intense for me.

Raven continued on her way as Starfire went to hunt down Robin. If television and romance novels have taught Starfire anything, it's that meeting the parents is both a humorous and very important part of a relationship.

**Main Room**

Raven entered the room and paused. All around the room there were shadow tentacles scrubbing the walls, floor, and various furniture. Shade was stretched out on the couch, sipping something…brown. And not chocolate brown either, it was more of a…nasty brown color. Raven's eye twitched. She leaned over the couch and poked his head.

Raven: What in the nine hell's is that your slurping? …you puréed pancakes?! How…how the…WHY the…?!

Taking a deep breath, Raven pinched the bridge of her nose. Take it easy…take it easy. She chuckled softly.

Raven: How do I let myself get so worked up about you? …yeah, you WISH that's what I meant.

Raven scratched behind his ear. It helped to break difficult news to him, you see.

Raven: My mother wants to meet you.

GLURSH! Liquid pancakes flowed out of his mouth. It would shoot out, but it was hard to do that with his jaw wired shut.

Shade: Wha?!

Raven: Don't try and talk, dummy. Yes, she wants to meet you…and she is. In three days.

Raven walked around and sat next to Shade on the couch.

Raven: You better be on your BEST behavior, you understand? I want Mother to see that you're not some pig. She has…issues with males, as you might expect. …I should punch you for asking me that. …okay, I can't stand it. Give me a sip of that.

Shrugging, Shade let Raven sip from his cup of liquid pancake. Raven smacked her lips, a thoughtful expression on her face.

Raven: …hmm. That's…actually pretty good. Butter and maple syrup too? …well, yes I suppose that is what pancakes are. It does? I didn't know that. …well, alright…but once it's off, be careful. Stick to soft foods, okay?

Shade had just told her his jaw wiring was coming off in two days. She was concerned about him, as a good girlfriend would be of her boyfriend, hence the advice…but there was a part of her that wasn't pleased about it coming off. For if it came off, then Shade would be able to speak. And when Shade speaks…he has a tendency to shove his foot deep into his mouth. …hell, into his stomach lining. Oh well. At least Raven was used to it by now. Hmm. Raven decided to inform her mother that Shade would be sans wire when he showed up. He'd be so pissed if he had to eat more apple sauce.

**Bathroom**

Robin sighed as he washed his hair. Training, as usual, was rough…but it had to be. When you don't have powers, you have to work your ass off. You couldn't let anything slip or else. You have to train until just getting yourself off the floor is a strain. It's not easy, nor would it ever…

Starfire: ROBIN!

Robin: GAH!

Robin yelped and grabbed the shower curtain, staying behind it. Starfire looked puzzled by the behavior.

Robin: S…Star, we've talked about this!

Yes, she recalled the "shower's are for one person only" and the "when someone is showering, the whole bathroom is to be considered a 'do not enter' zone" lectures. Still, she shrugged.

Starfire: I recall, but I had assumed that because we are the boyfriend and girlfriend, that such things were no longer a concern.

Robin: Er…that takes a little time, Star.

She pouted, hands on her hips and still floating in the middle of the bathroom.

Starfire: Honestly, you earthlings and your nudity issues. It confounds me.

Starfire leaned on the wall, turning away.

Starfire: I shall not look, but I refuse to leave.

Robin: But…

Starfire: Robin! We are not children. There is nothing to fear from me seeing you in the rough.

Robin: …in the buff.

Starfire: It sounded similar, at least. Nevertheless, my beloved, I am not afraid to see you without clothing, nor am I afraid that you may see me without clothing. Have we not self control? Does my laying eyes upon your body instantly insure that intercourse is to ensue?

Starfire paused in her speech. Robin blinked, realizing he was supposed to answer those questions. He rubbed the back of his head.

Robin: Well…no.

Starfire: Exactly. Then I see no reason for us to be so timid. Can you find fault in my logic?

Well, he had to admit, he couldn't. Sighing, Robin let the curtain go and resumed his shower. Well…if Terra and Beast Boy could fool around three to four times a week (Abandonment issues, plus being turned into a numb statue, equals slight case of nymphomania. As for Beast Boy…well, animals hump a lot), they could look at each other, he guessed.

Robin: No, I guess not. …um…can I ask you something, Starfire?

Starfire: We are being open, are we not?

Robin: Well, it's just…since about two days ago, you've been really…er…

How to put this lightly?

Robin: …agitated.

Yeah, that was good. Starfire raised an eyebrow.

Starfire: Agitated? I? No, you must be imagining things, Richard.

It certainly had NOTHING to do with her discovering that Robin was voted the hottest teen in Jump City by Jumped Magazine. It most certainly had nothing to do with the numerous fan mail caches Starfire discovered in his room while tending to his injuries about four days ago. AND IT MOST CERTAINLY HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT ONE OF THE GIRLS THEY RESCUED TRIED TO GIVE HIM HER UNDERPANTS IN THANKS! Nope. There was no reason at all for her to be agitated. As for Robin, he was pretty sure he WASN'T imagining it. Oh well. She'll talk when she's ready.

Robin: If you say so. …well, what's up? Why'd you come barging in?

Starfire: Oh, yes. I wish to meet your surrogate father.

There was a huge racket from the shower before the curtain was pulled back, Robin's green eyes wide.

Robin: WHAT?!

Starfire: I introduced you to mine, I believe it only fair. …Galfore is the only thing I have that is close to a father now. Ergo, I feel that I should meet your closest person to a father.

Robin: I don't think that's a good idea…

I mean, he only just recently started talking to Bruce again. After taking the Joker down, Batman gave him a ring to congratulate. Obviously he was just looking for an excuse. Emotions were never the Batman's forte, after all. Starfire crossed her arms.

Starfire: And why not?

Robin: W…well, uh…it's complicated.

Starfire: So is trigonometry, yet I understand that. Please, enlighten me.

…wow, she's been hanging around Raven way too long.

Robin: …alright. But he's probably too busy.

Starfire brightened right away.

Starfire: That is just fine, Robin. So long as I know you tried, I am happy.

And with that she departed. Robin sighed. How did Shade deal with Raven? That was how Raven USUALLY was. At least Starfire was usually a sweet girl. Oh well. Honestly, what were the odds the husk that is Batman would say yes to something like that?

**END PART ONE**


	3. Chapter 2

32 Productions Presents…

**32 Productions Presents…**

A Teen Titan Fan FictionThe Teen Titans in…

"**Meeting the Parents"**

**Chapter Two**

**Airport: The Next Day**

Richard groaned.

Richard: I can't believe he said "yes".

Starfire, now trying out her identity at "Kori D. Anders" (complete with passport and ID), giggled in response. She was wearing a long pink skirt with a semi-formal matching blouse. Richard felt it would be best that she didn't arrive at Wayne Manor in her original outfit of choice, a pair of Daisy Dukes and a tank top. Kori did complain about being unable to show mid-drift at first though.

Kori: I suppose we are simply fortunate.

Oh, speak for yourself. Richard wasn't looking forward to this. He thought he could get out of it when Raven stated that she was taking Shade to Azarath in two days…

**FLASHBACK**

We now join the conversation already in progress.

Beast Boy: ...rash finally went away after three days and it itched horribly…

Oh! Er…wrong flashback. Let's try again.

Raven: …coincidence. I'm taking Shade to meet my mother in three days. Two by the time you leave…she insisted on it.

Well…what a pity. Robin sighed, putting on his best "disappointed" act. He turned to Starfire.

Robin: Well, we can't just leave then. That'll only leave three people here to defend the city.

Terra spoke from the couch, not taking her eyes off the television screen.

Terra: Yeah, and we're the lazy jokers of the group.

Robin: …right, what she said. We can't do that.

Starfire: But…

Robin: Star, Raven's mother was the one who wanted to meet Shade. It's really out of her hands and…

Starfire: No, Robin, listen to me. We can simply call in temporary replacements as we did when we went on vacation. I would recommend…Sureshot, to replace you…Argent can act as both Raven and Shade…and perhaps Red Star for myself?

…why did they have to have so many honoraries? Stupid honorary Titans and their reliability.

**END FLASHBACK**

By the time they left, Sureshot and Red Star were already there. Cyborg dropped them off in the T-car, using holographic projectors to hide his identity as well as disguise the car. Sureshot seemed relieved that she wasn't being named leader this time. Cyborg was taking the position until Robin returned. They boarded the plane. Kori peered out the window, her smile turning nervous.

Richard: What's wrong, Kori?

Kori: N…nothing. A…all is well.

An irrational fear had suddenly gripped Kori's mind. She had flown in the T-ship dozens of times. Hell, she had flown unaided! …yet…this hulking metal craft, with its odd smells and visible engines…and the PEOPLE! Kori liked people, sure, but so tightly packed?! So…so…much like the slave ships! …well, not the seats, but still! People packed together, all ages, all sizes…forced to listen to a disembodied voice telling them what to do! NO SMOKING! …wait, that wasn't one of the things…but still! Yet Richard looked so calm. She had to take inspiration from him. Everything was fine…just fine…j…

Kori: What was that?!

Richard: That's just the engines firing up. Are you sure you're okay?

Kori: (high pitched) Memp!

Which was supposed to sound more like "yep", something Kori rarely ever uttered. Richard raised an eyebrow.

Richard: Just try and get some sleep. We'll be there in a couple of hours.

Kori: Y…yes, of course…sleep. I can sleep…

…how does one sleep again? She knew this one…Kori was almost certain she had done this not long ago. Might have been last night.

**Titan Tower: Hallway**

Red Star was getting reacquainted with his surroundings. It had been some time since he had last been in the tower, after all. …which was a fancy way of saying he was lost. As he turned the corner, he bumped into something, which promptly fell down with an "oof". Terra shook her head, standing back up and rubbing her tiny nose.

Red Star: I'm sorry, Terra. I did not see you.

Terra: Eh, I'm used to it. For some reason we bump into people a lot around here.

Chuckling, she knocked on his muscular chest.

Terra: Besides, I can think of worse things to press my face against.

Red Star looked embarrassed. Terra laughed and slapped his arm gently.

Terra: Relax, I'm only teasing you. Where you headed?

Red Star: Well…actually…

Terra: Lost, huh? Happened to me all the time when I first got here. We need to start hanging some signs…

Red Star: I was looking for the main room.

Terra: This way.

Terra started to lead Red Star down the halls.

Terra: So, how you been, Red?

Red Star: Well enough.

Terra sighed, putting both arms behind her head.

Terra: You're not very good at conversation, are you?

Red Star: What do you want me to say?

Terra: Give me an example on how "well enough" your life has been. What's up? What's going on?

Red Star rubbed his arm.

Red Star: Well…I'm dating.

Terra froze in mid-step, spinning around and getting closer to him.

Terra: Now you're talking my language. Spill it. Tell me about her.

Red Star hesitated. Terra…had that gossipy look to her. She would probably tell everyone she could (and she would, she really would).

Red Star: Well…she's…uh…Latino…

Which was true.

Terra: Uh huh…what else?

Red Star: She's rather tall.

Also true.

Terra: …you don't want to tell me, do you? Fine, I won't push. Just treat her nice, got it? You may be strong, but girls can cause whole new meanings of hurt on you.

Red Star sweatdropped, but nodded. Actually…Pantha could hurt him without using new meanings. She was a biiiiig girl. Upon entering the main room, they found Sureshot on the computer. Terra walked over and looked up the screen.

Terra: Scanning the city?

Sureshot: …I'm composing an e-mail.

Looking at the screen, she read the e-mail real fast.

Terra: Oh. To Matt, huh? You been in touch with him?

Sureshot: Yes. He means a lot to me. I'm not certain why, but that's how I feel. I want to make sure he's taken care of, so I check on him once a week, more if he replies with something that requests a response.

Terra: So it's NOT another boyfriend on the side?

Sureshot shook her head.

Sureshot: No, I'm quite satisfied with Victor.

Groaning, Terra hung her head.

Terra: Great, both replacements are completely humorless.

Red Star: I am not humorless!

Terra: The hell you're not. Name one funny thing you've done since I've met you.

Red Star: I snuck into Raven's room with the others and found black lingerie.

THUMP. The sound of a book falling to the floor made them turn to the door. Raven's jaw hung open, her eyes focused on Red Star with a glare that was rapidly becoming murderous.

Raven: You saw WHAT?!

Terra: Wow, you are so dead, Red.

Sureshot: I'll give Pantha your regards.

Terra: …Pantha?! That's who you were talking about?!

Red Star gulped.

Red Star: Now, Raven…it wasn't my doing. Kid Flash and Herald wanted to search your room…

Raven slid along the floor until her face was inches from his.

Raven: You just told Terra! Nobody but Shade was supposed to know about that…and not until next year! Don't ANY of you mention it again! Do you understand me? That is his eighteenth birthday present!

Terra whistled in surprise.

Terra: Wow, Raven...didn't think you had it in you.

Raven: I'm not a dead fish.

Sureshot: Though you have the complexion of one's underbelly.

Raven: Oh f you all. Could we NOT pick on me? I'm a little stressed out.

Picking up her book, Raven plopped onto the couch with an annoyed huff and started reading.

**Gotham City Airport**

After prying Kori's hands from the seat where she had dug them in deeply and getting off the plane before anyone noticed the marks, the two were walking through the airport. Kori was embarrassed at her behavior and was quite glad she prevented herself from doing what she wanted to do: Stand up, run around the plane and shout "We are all going to die!" at the top of her three lungs (I don't know if she really has three, but it would explain those folk songs, wouldn't it?). As they made their way out, Richard say something that made him smile. A familiar older gentleman holding a sign that said "Grayson".

Richard: Alfred!

Alfred: Master Dick, you're looking well.

Richard: You too, Alfred. This is Kori Anders. Kori, this is Alfred.

Kori: I am most pleased to meet you.

Alfred: Mrs. Anders, the pleasure is all mine. Shall we go, Master Dick? I can't guarantee Master Bruce will be home when you arrive…but I'm sure you expect that by now.

Richard grumbled, but nodded his head. Yeah, he expected that. After loading his bags into the waiting limo, Kori and Richard got into the car as Alfred drove them to STATELY WAYNE MANOR!

**STATELY WAYNE MANOR!**

Yes, it's STATELY WAYNE MANOR home of BILLIONAIRE BRUCE WAYNE AND HIS YOUNG WARD! …well, it WAS home to his young ward. Then he moved to the other side of the country and…well, you know how it went from there. Kori stepped out of the limo and gaped at the huge building.

Kori: …you…lived here?

Richard: Yeah…

Kori: You…here…?

Richard: It's not that big of a deal, is it?

Alfred: It tends to lose impact when one sees it day to day, Master Dick.

Kori just stared.

Kori: HERE? X'hal, it is the size of my…no, it is BIGGER then my palace!

Alfred: Palace?

Richard: Alien princess, Al.

Alfred: Ah. Wayne Manor has always been the United Nations of the universe, I suppose.

Kori scratched her head.

Kori: Would that not make it…the U.P. for United Planets? Or perhaps U.G. for United Galaxies…

Richard: It was sarcasm, Kori.

Kori: Ooooh…Raven says the sarcasm in a different manner, so I was not certain.

Richard: Raven says EVERYTHING in the same manner.

Alfred led them inside.

Alfred: Oh, Master Dick…I was wondering if you brought your...evening attire with you.

Which was code for costume.

Richard: We both did, Alfred. It was kind of hard not to.

Kori felt dizzy from the size of the main hall itself. …probably because she kept spinning around in an attempt to take it all in.

Kori: Such a magnificent dwelling…I envy you, Richard. …though I do not envy the ones who must clean this place.

Alfred: It IS a full time job, Ms Anders.

Kori: You perform the cleaning alone? Truly you are dedicated to your profession.

Alfred: Thank you, Ms Anders, but it's more then taking pride in my work that keeps me here. If you'll both excuse me, I'll begin cooking dinner. It'll be interesting to make something that will actually be eaten without needing reheating.

With that, Alfred proceeded to the kitchen. Richard sighed. It was great seeing Alfred again…but he was still tense about Bruce.

Kori: Richard, could you show me around? I would like very much to see the manor in full.

Richard: …sure, Kori.

**Library: One Tour Later**

Kori examined the vast collection of books. Raven would have melted into a happy puddle of contentment at the sight of them all. …Kori giggled, literally imagine Raven melting into a puddle with a big smiley face on it. Wow, that was a weird thought.

Voice: You must be Starfire.

The voice was deep and menacing. Gulping, Starfire turned to see…a rather handsome looking man with a scowl that made her very nervous. Swallowing, she nodded.

Kori: Er…yes, I am…though I am currently going by…

Bruce: Kori D. Anders, a play on your given name "Koridan'r".

Kori's jaw dropped. It was obvious that this man was Bruce Wayne. His picture was around the house, after all. …not to mention on the magazines in the airport. Shaking it off, she smiled nervously.

Kori: I assume Richard as told you about me.

Richard: Not THAT much.

Richard scowled at Bruce from the entrance to the room. Bruce had come through the clock entrance to the bat cave. Kori was so distracted that she didn't notice it.

Richard: You decided to do a background check?

Bruce: Don't look so shocked. I've done the same to your entire team.

And there it was. That's one of the many reasons Richard left. Batman, always nosing in on his life.

Bruce: You can't be surprised.

Richard: I'm not. Doesn't mean I'm happy either.

Kori chewed on her bottom lip. She felt she should say something…but…had no idea what it would be.

**Kori's Bedroom**

Richard sighed as Kori opened the door to her room. She turned to him.

Kori: Did I upset him somehow? I did not mean to cause problems this evening.

Dinner had been one of the tensest moments in Kori's recent memory. Bruce wouldn't say…ANYTHING to her. NOT A THING! Oh, he talked to Richard alright...but none of what you'd expect of a father who hadn't seen his son in a long time. It was ALLLLLLLLL work! Kori's head threatened to explode as she tried to comprehend what had occurred. Hell, Kori doubted Raven would be so cold toward her children…even if they weren't biologically hers.

Richard: No, that's just how he is. If he acts friendly toward you, you can pretty much be assured it's just that. An act.

Kori: …oh. I see…

No she didn't. Humans…what a bizarre breed of creatures. And she had agreed to stay for a couple of DAYS of this? What the hell was she thinking?

Richard: Don't worry about it, Kori. It's not your fault. Get some sleep, okay?

Kori: I shall. Thank you, Richard. Good night to you.

Richard: 'night.

Kori slipped into her room. Richard sighed.

Richard: It doesn't work so well on someone you've trained, Bruce.

Bruce: I think you just know me too well.

And that was true. Richard hadn't picked up a thing from Bruce's spying…but he knew that he'd be there. Richard moved away from Kori's room so she wouldn't hear.

Richard: Well, you've managed to make her think she's done something wrong.

Bruce: She'll get over it. I want to discuss the real reason I said yes to your request.

…he knew it. Richard KNEW there was something up! He knew it! Sighing, Richard nodded.

Richard: Okay, what is it?

Bruce: It'll be easier to show you in the cave.

Cue the spinning bat emblem! Bana nana bana nana na na!

**END PART TWO**


	4. Chapter 3

32 Productions Presents…

**32 Productions Presents…**

A Teen Titan Fan FictionThe Teen Titans in…

"**Meeting the Parents"**

**Chapter Three**

**TO THE BATCAVE, OLD CHUM!**

Robin sighed. So much for not having to wear the costume while he was in Gotham. Well, to be honest, he expected as much. Batman sat at his computer and started typing.

Batman: Not too long ago, a cult calling itself "The Church of the White Cloth" came into Gotham.

Robin: Never heard of it.

Batman: Neither have I, so I did some checking on it. It's not clear who or what it is they worship. What is clear is that they're well financed. They've been giving large donations to various charities all over the city.

So far, Robin wasn't seeing a big threat. Still, he let his former mentor continue.

Batman: While that's fine…if a bit odd that they'd be so wealthy yet have only formed very recently…they also opened a criminal rehabilitation program. Thus far, they've had about a 98 percent success rating.

Robin: Let me guess. The 2 percent comes from Arkham?

Batman: Exactly…though some of the less disturbed have also been rehabilitated. Scarface, for example.

Robin: You mean the Ventriloquist.

Batman: I mean Scarface. Wesker is still the same.

…Robin wasn't going to ask how that worked.

Batman: Also, the rehabilitated become extremely devoted to the cult.

Robin: So if they're actually up to something, they'd have the help of all sorts of scum at their fingertips.

Batman: Exactly. I suspect a form of brainwashing. It's the only thing I can think of that would make all of these people willing to work for the same goal. Money alone couldn't insure this much devotion. Whatever it is, I don't like it. Sneaking in is virtually impossible. The place is always crawling with people at all hours of the day.

Robin: Not sure why you want me here for this.

Batman: I need to get inside…and the only way to do that is to be LET inside.

Robin sighed. He could see where this was going.

Robin: So you want me to earn myself a spot on the rehabilitation program?

Batman: You won't have to. Teenagers can be let in on a different program for problem children.

Robin: Is that a subtle hint, Bruce?

He didn't respond to Robin's comment.

Batman: Having been gone for as long as you have, it would be fairly simple to create detention center records that would convince them to let you in.

Robin: Uh huh. And if I wind up getting compromised?

Batman: That won't be a problem.

Mysterious sounding son of a…

Batman: We'll worry about the details tomorrow. Get some rest.

Grumble…grumble…never changes…grumble…grumble…controlling jerk…

**Titan Tower: Main Room, Next Day**

The others watched in shock, revolution and slight fascination as Shade consumed his breakfast, using his once again free mouth. Raven held her head and sighed.

Raven: Shade, for the love of Azar, chew with your mouth closed.

Beast Boy: He is. It's just…everywhere.

Raven: I…I think my mind is having trouble grasping just what exactly he's doing wrong. I can't tell him not to do it.

She groaned.

Raven: Shade, slow down, you're giving me a headache trying to understand why I'm so repulsed.

Shade: Sorry, sorry.

Shade ate at a more normal speed. Everyone relaxed.

Cyborg: Hungry, man?

Shade: You got no idea. It sucks eating liquefied food. Your stomach doesn't fill up at all.

Terra: My stomach never fills up either.

Terra poked her stomach, shaking her head. Just FIVE pounds. Ten at most, that's all she wanted. Stupid tabloids kept claiming she had an eating disorder.

Sureshot: …well, my appetite is now completely destroyed by Shade's display of gluttony.

Red Star: Mine as well.

Beast Boy: Ehh…mine's been cut in half.

Terra: …I'm actually hungrier then usual now that I've watched him eat. You gonna eat that biscuit?

Shade: Go ahead.

Terra snatched a biscuit and bit into it. Raven groaned.

Raven: I live with pigs…and I'm DATING one. There must be something wrong with me.

**Raven's Soul**

Yellow sweatdropped as she watched Purple. She was running around in circles. Sighing, Yellow walked away. Purple never was quiet right.

Purple: Love lift me up where I belong!

**Reality**

Raven shuddered. Yes, definitely something wrong with her. …aw, well. At least Shade was better now. She really was glad to see him without that wired shut jaw.

Shade: C'mon, Raven, eat something. I get worried when you don't eat.

Shade offered her some of his waffle. Raven, being very fond of waffles (and you thought she was being sarcastic, didn't you?), accepted it.

Raven: Thanks.

Mmm…syrupy, buttery, waffley goodness.

**MEANWHILE, IN THE BATCAVE!**

Infiltration had gone like clockwork. They accepted Richard in with open arms. Kori…now in her costume once more and therefore called Starfire...had protested this plan, but it did her no good. The Batman was waiting for Richard's report, which would be in a sort of code to disguise it as a normal bit of mail. Before Richard left, he insisted Starfire be allowed into the cave. After threatening to not go along with the plan otherwise, Batman gave in.

Starfire: I would like to say again that I do not approve of this plan.

Batman: Duly noted.

Starfire: I do not see why I was not asked to go. While Richard has not been in Gotham for a while, I myself have never been. I would not be recognized.

That comment didn't even get an answer. The reason was simple, actually. Batman didn't trust her. From what he's read, she's overly emotional, naïve, and prone to babbling secrets to people. In other words, completely unreliable. Batman only allowed her to be there for Robin's sake. …it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact they were dating. Nope. Nothing at all. Robin's personal life was his problem, not the Batman's. Nope. Starfire huffed in annoyance. Just then an alarm went off. Starfire jumped.

Starfire: What is that?

Batman: The Bat-signal has been activated. Stay here.

Starfire: I will not! Perhaps you do not need my assistance, but I would not be able to stomach sitting here while a crime is being committed.

The girl had good intentions, that much was clear, but her naivety would give Clark's a run for his money. Batman stood from his chair and glared at her. She faltered for but a moment, another point to her. …well…Robin had faith in her. He supposed Robin's judgment probably had SOME merit.

Batman: Do what you want, as long as you stay out of my way.

Starfire: I am aware of how to operate in tandem with one of similar training as yourself, as you'll recall.

Batman: …just stay out of sight while I find out what the problem actually is.

Starfire agreed to that.

**G.P.D. Rooftop**

Batman swung onto the top of the building. Starfire remained hidden, floating just under the roof edge, allowing her to hear everything said.

Gordon: Fourth disappearance this month. Same as all the others. Not so much as a hair left behind. Each one disappearing at the same spot, the old trail by Kinston Woods

Batman grunted, examining the photograph he had been given.

Batman: All the others…males?

Gordon: Yes, as a matter of fact…

Starfire watched the Batman jump off the roof and swing away.

Gordon: …is that importa…damn it, why do I bother finishing my sentences?

Staying low, Starfire followed Batman as he swung back down to the Batmobile.

Starfire: Simply from knowing that they are males, you understand the situation?

Batman: Stay in the air and out of sight…and remember the signal.

Getting into his car, Batman sped off. Starfire's jaw dropped incredulously. The nerve of that man! Clenching her teeth, Starfire followed him.

**Kinston Woods**

Starfire remained floating out of sight, as she was instructed. It annoyed her that she had to listen to this man…yet he DID train Robin. That meant, while his manner was repelling, he was qualified to give these instructions. Meanwhile, Batman slipped silently through the woods, a small but powerful flashlight in hand. He knew this was the right spot. He just had to…there. That faint noise…like something…no multiple some things slithering. He turned and hurled a batarang, pinning one of the oncoming vines to the ground below. There were more though. He dodged them as they tried to ensnare him, however there were too many to dodge forever. Starfire bit her lip. She wanted to help…but before speaking to Gordon, Batman had given her a signal. …if he was anything like Robin, he would be upset if she simply charged in without giving his plan faith. Even as the Batman was caught by the veins, she held back. Waiting...watching. A red haired woman with greenish skin and seemingly garbed in leaves stepped out from behind a tree.

Poison Ivy: Why? Why do you always come to me, yet never bow like all the others, Batman?

Batman: Perhaps it's because you can't seem to resist making your presence known by murdering people.

She slinked over, the vines holding him in place tightly.

Poison Ivy: Murder? All I'm doing is providing for my little Brutus.

Batman: …

He knew he was going to regret asking this.

Batman: …Brutus?

The answer came in the form of a huge plant emerging from the ground. It was apparently the owner of the vines. It began to pull him toward its mouth, which looked similar to a Venus flytrap.

Poison Ivy: Any last words, Batman?

Batman: …now.

He made a motion with his hand. Instantly, Starfire swooped down and used her eyebeams to cut all the vines off, letting Batman free. Brutus, however, regenerated rapidly, new vines growing and attacking Starfire. Starfire let them wrap around her arms and flew straight up, uprooting the plant.

Poison Ivy: BRUTUS!

The plant struggled with its intended prey, but Starfire was too strong for it. Meanwhile, Batman took care of Poison Ivy. Starfire returned with two halves of the plant as he handcuffed her.

Poison Ivy: Brutus…

Batman had them hide when the police came by to pick her up. Starfire didn't understand why, but did as she was asked.

Batman: …that was a foolish thing you did, ripping that plant in half. There could have been a corrosive substance inside it.

Starfire: Wh…what?

With that, he turned and walked toward the Batmobile. Starfire's eye twitched. He didn't even thank her! Why that no good…AARGH!

**THE BATCAVE! NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BATMAN!**

A message from Richard had come in (addressed to Bruce, of course). Translated, it said that he had found nothing yet, though by tomorrow he should have something. Starfire was still concerned about him and was going to say as much when Batman spoke first.

Batman: I won't be needing you anymore tonight. Go upstairs.

…she wondered if she could hurt him…just a little. Grinding her teeth in suppressed rage, Starfire went upstairs. In her anger, she almost knocked over Alfred, who was carrying two cups of what appeared to be tea on a tray. Fortunately, it didn't spill.

Starfire: Oh X'hal, forgive me Alfred. I was not observing where I was going.

Alfred: No harm done, Ms Anders. Tea?

Thanking him, Starfire took the cup and carefully sipped it.

Starfire: It is very delicious…

Alfred: I see Master Bruce's amiable attitude towards others hasn't changed.

Starfire: …oh. Yes, I suppose it has not.

It took her a moment to recognize such practiced sarcasm. Raven could take lessons.

Starfire: I only wish to be of assistance...and I am more the capable of it. I have been practicing combat since I was six.

Alfred: Master Bruce's trust has never been easy to earn, Ms Anders, but it is possible. Simply do your best.

Starfire: In a job such as this, doing less then your best is akin to murder, I think.

Alfred: Then I believe you've found common ground.

Excusing herself, Starfire went upstairs to sleep and await Richard's next bit of news.

**Titan Tower: Raven's Room, Next Day**

Raven brushed Shade's coat off, looking him up and down. Shade sighed.

Shade: Is this really necessary?

Raven: Mother said she wants to meet you and I really…

Shade: Not that part. I'm talking about you looking me over like a drill sergeant at inspection.

Raven ignored the question and continued to look him over. She wanted him to look perfect for this. Finding nothing else amiss, Raven sat down on her floor.

Raven: Sit across from me and hold my hands. Close your eyes and don't say a damn thing, okay?

Shade: Uh huh.

Doing as she instructed, Shade sat down across from Raven and took her hands. Raven closed her eyes and focused her energies.

Raven: _Azarath…to Azarath…take us to Azarath…come on…Azarath…_

Raven felt the familiar sensation of dropping without really falling as they went through the barrier of dimensions. When it was over, Raven opened her eyes, no longer in her room.

Raven: You can open your eyes now.

Shade: …eeeh…

Raven stared at him. He was looking at the surrounding buildings and landscape.

Raven: "Eeeh"? What do you mean by "eeeh"?

Shade: Nothing. Not a thing.

Raven: You mean something or you wouldn't say it.

Raven put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot in annoyance. Shade sighed.

Shade: I just expected it to be more…I dunno…mystical.

Raven: How much more mystical?

Shade: Look, I take it back, okay?

Raven: No, I want to hear this. How much more mystical did you expect my home to be?

Shade: You're making a big deal out of nothing…

Raven: Shade…how. Much. More. Mystical?

Shade: Flying carpets and symbols painted everywhere.

Raven sighed and shook her head.

Raven: That's it? You kept that argument up for that long and that's all?

Shade: Well, I didn't want to offend you…and before you ask, it just slipped out.

Arella: WHAT…just slipped out?

Shade: GAH!

Raven pinched the bridge of her nose as Shade leapt at the sound of Arella's voice, who had crept up behind him, and hid behind her.

Raven: Shade, this is my mother, Arella.

Shade: Jeez, she sneaks up on people just like you! ….I mean, hello Ms…um…Raven's mom.

Raven: Roth, you idiot.

Shade: Riiight. Ms Roth. …you never told me your last name was Roth.

Raven: Yes I did.

Arella sighed as her daughter and boyfriend continued to debate whether or not Raven had ever mentioned her last name. Finally she cleared her throat, gaining their attention.

Arella: It's nice to meet you, Shade. Raven's told me a lot about you.

Shade: You should know, only half of what she says is truth. The rest is just her making wild jumps to conclusions.

Raven: I never make jumps to conclusions, wild or otherwise.

Shade: You accused me of hiding your tea so that you would be listless and tired in the morning because I had mentioned the day before that you would be and you said it wasn't true. You assumed I was trying to prove it. You had brewed the last bag the day before and forgot to buy more.

Raven cleared her throat.

Raven: Okay, that was one time.

Shade: And then there was the time you thought I was cheating on you with Starfire when I had asked her to help me get you a present to make up for accidentally spilling white out on the conclusion page of your book.

…she never did find out how that book ended. …it was a nice necklace…before she threw it into the ocean, thinking it was Starfire's. …and before you think that she was acting too irrational for Raven, you should know it was THAT time. Yes…March Madness. That always made Raven act weird. But you knew that already, right? I mean, that should be obvious.

Raven: Alright, alright. I jump to conclusions about you a lot.

Shade: Well, there you go. Nice to meet you too, Ms Roth.

Arella: Please, call me Arella. "Ms Roth" is far too formal for Azarath. We're all equals here. I trust you remember where you live, Raven.

Raven: LIVED…but yes, I do.

The house looked exactly like everyone else's. It was sort of dome shaped, large, oval shaped door for some reason and circular windows. …guess everyone WAS equal around here. Inside was a rather plain room. Shade looked at Raven questioningly. She sighed.

Raven: This is a pacifistic dimension, Shade. Things are kept equal among everyone. Beds, couches, even the wall paper.

Shade: …that's…so boring.

Arella: Perhaps so, but it's also peaceful. Please, have a seat.

Arella gestured toward a chair. A singular chair. Raven gave her mother a questioning look as Shade shrugged and sat down. Raven sat on the couch next to her mother…with her mother between her and Shade. Hmm…

Arella: So, Shade…how well do you know my little girl?

Shade: Past wise? Only what she's willing to tell. I don't dig much. About her personality, however, I know a lot. Like how when I say something she doubts is true, her mouth droops slightly and she snorts softly.

Raven's mouth drooped slightly and she…holy crap, he was right!

Shade: And when she stops listening to me and starts to day dream to escape her current situation, her head starts to move back and forth to background music only she can hear.

…it does?! Crap! …well, at least he didn't know what the music was.

Arella: What's the music?

Shade: Oh, now that's easy. See, she often forgets I can hear what's going on in her head if I try. It's often classical music, like Beethoven's Fifth or once she got a country song stuck in her head about checking someone for ticks.

Raven: Shut up, don't mention that song!

…there really is such a song. …and people LOVE it. Doesn't that scare the crap outta you? I mean, seriously?

Arella: I see…

Arella wasn't sure what she thought about this guy. He seemed to be examining her daughter pretty intently…

**END PART THREE**


	5. Chapter 4

32 Productions Presents…

**32 Productions Presents…**

A Teen Titan Fan FictionThe Teen Titans in…

"**Meeting the Parents"**

**Chapter Four**

**Outside Titan Tower**

Argent landed, shaking her head. She wanted her own tower. Well, not hers specifically, but she wanted a tower to call home. Approaching the front door, she racked her brain for a second before remembering the pass code and putting it into the keypad. The door slid open and she went inside. Starfire was sitting at the couch, staring at the television intently. Argent blanched at what she was watching. It was one of those operating shows.

Starfire: (muttering) So this is the "liver" humans speak of…

Her kind had no liver. She was pretty sure that, judging from descriptions, it was her fifth stomach that did those duties as well as digest food. …well, YOU explain how she can have so many organs and not be a bloated mess! I say that she has multi-purpose organs! Argent leaned over the couch.

Argent: Ya watch the most disturbing things, Star.

…yeah, that's the best I can do to illustrate that she has a New Zealand accent. It's not very good, is it? Wish I knew some New Zealand type terms, but the best I got is "bullocks", "mate", and "love". …and I'm not even sure that's correct for the region.

Starfire: Oh! Argent, I did not hear you come in.

Argent: I noticed. Ya seemed a bit caught up in your programs. Shade around?

Starfire: I am afraid he has already departed with Raven.

Argent clenched her fist. Raven. Raven, Raven, Raven. Always with Raven. Argent couldn't STAND that. Argent had a thing for the dark and mysterious type, hence why she liked Shade. He was mysterious and you can't get much darker then using shadows as weapons. So, naturally, she took a shining to Shade and attempted to convince him to go out with her. She wouldn't call it LOVE, per say, but she wouldn't mind giving it a go. Argent took the direct approach with guys, not just flirting until they ask HER out. She thought that was part of her "charm". Unfortunately…

**FLASHBACK: Hallway**

Argent leaned on the wall next to Shade, giving him her best smile.

Argent: So, what do ya say? Fancy going out for a while?

Shade rubbed the back of his neck, nervously. Argent was attractive to be sure, but…

Shade: I can't, Argent. I'm with Raven.

Argent looked shocked.

Argent: Come again? The girl smacked you with her book not two hours ago!

Shade: Yeah, she does that.

Argent was stunned. Why would Shade date a girl that struck him with a book? That was a heavy looking book! Why did all of Raven's books have to be bigger then her own head?

Argent: Why would you put up with that?

Shade: You wouldn't understand.

Argent: …what, you into that sort of thing? That whole "(whip crack whip crack) call me queen" sort of thing?

Shade shuddered and shook his head.

Shade: Hell no.

Argent: Then why…?

And that was when Raven showed up. Apparently she had overheard the whole exchange and was in Argent's face in seconds.

Raven: He said NO. Let it drop.

Argent: Why the hell should I? You don't deserve him if you're gonna hit him like that!

Raven: Don't you DARE judge me.

Argent: Why, you…

Raven grabbed Shade's arm.

Raven: We're leaving. Now.

Shade: Right, right. Later Argent.

Argent shook with anger as Raven led him off.

**END FLASHBACK**

It wasn't right. Shade deserved better then some crazy bitch what hit him all the time. Robin was also dark and mysterious, but at least Starfire was good to him. …she could also break Argent in half if she made a move, so he was out of the question. Besides, it wasn't just for her sake anymore. Argent felt she HAD to get that harpy's talons out of Shade or something bad might happen to the guy. Sighing, Argent headed for her room.

**Gotham City: Church of the White Cloak**

Starfire struggled against her bindings, thinking back to how this happened. The e-mail had come earlier that day. Richard had found what he had been searching for. A device that, when used, could make the subject very suggestible. He was going to leave a way in open, allowing Batman and Starfire inside. Once night had fallen, the pair slipped into the building. It didn't take long for them to fall right into a trap. Starfire was surprised at how…UN-surprised Batman was. In any case, they found themselves surrounded by followers. It was a huge mob! Countless! The pair tried to fight them back, but one of them managed to inject Starfire with a heavy sedative. Even now, she was still trying to snap out of the effects. She assumed that Batman had been overwhelmed. It was a possibility. They were crazed fighters…madmen. So now, there they were, dangling over a vat of disturbing looking red fluid. A woman stepped out of the crowd around them.

Woman: Rise, your most holiness…rise BROTHER BLOOD!

Starfire's eyes widened. Brother Blood?! Something rose from the vat, covered in the red fluid…which now Starfire could safely assume was in fact, blood. Somehow, the white cloak he was wearing didn't get any of the fluid on it…and he was submerged! Wait a second…

Starfire: Who are you? You are not Brother Blood…

Unless Brother Blood somehow regressed in age by about forty years, this was not Brother Blood. He looked younger then she was!

Brother Blood: Oh, you mean my father. I stabbed him in the chest and removed what passed for his heart a couple of months ago.

Starfire: WH…WHAT?!

Brother Blood: That's how it works. The title of Brother Blood comes with varying powers, including near eternal life…but it carries the curse that makes the son stab the father in the heart, passing the title.

Starfire: H…how barbaric…

Woman: Silence! Do not question the book of Blood!

Starfire: The…book of Blood?

Brother Blood shrugged, wiping red fluid from his face.

Brother Blood: The whole "Church of the White Cloak" is just a temporary alias. After my father foolishly attempted to take over the world by being a teacher to super villains, our ability to call ourselves "The Church of Blood" was hampered.

Now, Mother, if you would kindly call the newest member of our congregation forward, we can begin the sacrifice.

It always had to be a sacrifice, didn't it? Well…HOLY CRAP! Richard…RICHARD of all people stepped forward, staring at them as if he had no idea who they were.

Brother Blood: It was thanks to this one that we knew you were coming. And now…he will be the one to send you into the Pit of Blood.

He reached for the lever that would drop the thing they were bound to into the pit.

Batman: Trapeze.

An odd thing to say, but the effect was immediate. Instead of the lever, Richard hit a button that freed them. Starfire grabbed Batman and helped him to the ground.

Brother Blood: Wh…but how?! The conditioning was flawless!

Batman: I couldn't allow him to join you with intimate knowledge about us in case he was compromised like he was. So I made sure he no longer HAD that knowledge through hypnotism. I simply used a trigger word to erase the implant.

Now completely unprepared, the Church of Blood couldn't beat them. Brother Blood clenched his fists as his followers failed him.

Brother Blood: This changes nothing. We've still got all of Gotham's underworld under our control and you've got no way to prove it.

Batman: Wrong. While we were allowing you to capture us, another person snuck into your church and hacked into your computer. Everyone in Gotham PD is going to get a very interesting bit of e-mail.

Starfire: …allowing?!

Blood growled in rage and leapt at them. Starfire caught him.

Starfire: Be calm, young one. This battle is…OW!

Starfire cried out as the teenage high priest bit into her arm with sharp canines. He slugged her, leaving her dazed.

Brother Blood: Father had mind controlling powers…I, however, gain power through blood. Now…how do you…?

Blood growled in annoyance. Yes, he HAD the powers…but he didn't know how to ACTIVATE them. Completely unprepared, a solid punch from Batman brought him down. The Church of the White Cloak was officially no longer welcome in Gotham City.

**Azarath: Arella's house**

Arella had seen enough. She had studied Shade closely and had made up her mind.

Arella: Shade, may I speak to you outside in private?

Shade: Uh…sure, Arella.

Raven frowned as she watched her mother lead him out of the house. Creeping over, she hid near the window to listen to them.

Arella: …I'll be frank, Shade. I want you to stay away from my daughter.

Raven was stunned. Shade, equally so, if not more.

Arella: You're a brute, Shade. Selfish, irritating, and uncouth. You talk with your mouthful, you speak crudely and swear constantly. You're angry, violent, and you dress like a hood on the streets. Raven deserves better. I want you to stay away.

Releasing the breath she didn't even know she was holding, Raven was about to rip the door off its hinges and give her nosy mother a piece of her mind when Shade spoke up.

Shade: You know…Raven's very lucky to have a mother like you. I mean, mine tried to kill me when I was three years old and abused me from four until I left around age twelve. That said…you have no damn right to speak to me that way.

Raven's jaw dropped.

Shade: Selfish? You call me selfish? I came here today. You might think that's no big deal, but given that my mother beat me with a metal rod I'm actually TERRIFIED of meeting people's mothers. When I first met you, I didn't just hide behind Raven because you startled me. I did it because you're a mother. I quickly realized you're not like mine, but that doesn't mean I'm comfortable around you. I forced myself to come here because Raven wanted me to meet you. She felt it was important and I trusted her judgment. Irritating. Yeah, some times I am. I'm well aware of my lack of social skills. But I've got a green friend who tells bad jokes, a big metal guy who seems to have trouble controlling the volume of his voice, a cheerful girl who gives the most painful hugs, an obsessive guy in a mask, and a skinny tomboy who eats everything in the tower living with me. We're ALL pretty irritating, and we're all friends. You don't know me well enough to judge whether I'm irritating most of the time or just now and then. Uncouth…what makes me uncouth? My swearing? Like I said, I'm a god damn ABUSE VICTIM. I'm entitled to bad words now and then. And I could go on, but the most important thing to realize here is I love your daughter and she loves me. We've been inside each others HEADS. We know the weird things that go on inside each other, we acknowledge them and accept them. She's not under any delusions about who and what I am and I'm not putting any false airs up around her. If you don't like us together, well…that's too damn bad. You know why? Because when she's with me, Raven SMILES.

Raven slumped against the wall, touched. His way of doing it was a bit harsh…but he stuck up for their relationship instead of Raven having to convince him that her mother was wrong. Shade often expressed doubts that they belonged together…stating that he didn't understand how he managed to earn her affections. …and he stuck up for it. To her shock, Raven heard her mother laugh.

Arella: Very good. Very good, Shade. Raven, come out here please.

Swallowing, Raven stood up and came outside.

Arella: I trust you heard that.

Raven: Yes, and I…

Arella: You both have my blessing.

…buh?

Shade: Huh wha who wha?

Raven: What he said.

Arella: I could see a lot of emotional insecurities in you, Shade. While Raven did argue with you a lot, I could see a glow in her I never noticed while she was here. That said, I needed to make sure that one of the things you were insecure about wasn't how you felt about Raven. Though…that was a bit harsh.

Shade rubbed the back of his head.

Shade: Heh…well…I was a little angry…  
Arella: That's alright. As for you, Raven…try and ease up on him a little. He IS trying…as inept as he seems.

Shade: H…hey, come on now, don't gang up on me.

Raven: I will, Mother. …thank you. Okay, Shade…let's go home.

Arella smiled as she watched them go. Yes, he'd do just fine… Her smile fell. But if he laid one hand on her before marriage, he was going to be skinned alive!

**Titan Tower: Raven's Room**

The pair reappeared and Raven slouched over, panting. Shade helped her up.

Shade: You okay?

Raven: Y…yeah…just…tired.

Shade sighed and shook his head. Confused, Raven tilted her own.

Raven: What?

Shade: Your mom is weird.

Raven: What? Why is she weird?

Shade: Do you know how pissed I was? Your mom freaked me out, Raven!

Shrugging, Raven regained her balance.

Raven: She was just looking out for me.

Shade: By being weird.

Raven: If need be, I suppose.

Grumbling, Shade headed out the door. Raven sat on her bed and relaxed a moment before…

Argent: Oi, Shade! How are ya, love?

Raven almost broke her own door down.

Raven: Hello, Argent.

Argent gave her a look that spoke volumes. Raven returned one several decibels louder.

Shade: Um…I'm fine. You?

Argent: (grit teeth) I WAS doing just aces not three seconds ago.

Shade: Yeeeaaah…I'm just gonna…leave now before something unpleasant takes place.

Shade disappeared. Argent glowered at Raven.

Argent: So, what is it? Mind control?

Raven: You just can't handle the fact he loves me.

Argent: And you think he doesn't look at me? Do you know how many times I almost kissed him?

For a moment Raven looked stunned before shaking it off and smirking.

Raven: "Almost" only matters in horseshoes, Argent.

Argent: Screw you. One of these days he's going to see you for what you are and dump your ass.

Raven: Keep telling yourself that.

The two glared a moment longer.

Argent: Bitch.

Raven: Skank.

Turning up their noses, the two girls turned and walked away.

**Plane Ride back to Jump**

The visit was over, Blood was in jail (for the moment, but it was likely that the Church of Blood could afford some damn good lawyers, not to mention he was only thirteen years old), and now it was time to go. Bruce bid them both good bye. It was almost touching…almost. Starfire still wasn't sure if she liked the man. He seemed to be a bit of an asshole. …but he knew what he was doing and if there was no Batman, there would be no Robin. That alone made his presence…tolerable. As for his opinion of her…it didn't seem to change at all. But that was fine. Starfire didn't care what he thought. Once again under the guise of Kori Anders, Kori turned to Richard.

Kori: One thing I still do not understand. Who retrieved the information needed to close down the rehabilitation program?

Richard: Oh, that was Babs. She…

…yuh oh.

Kori: …Richard? Darling? Beloved of mine?

Richard: …yes, Kori?

Kori: Who the f is "Babs" and how long have you known her?

…eeeeeeeh…

Richard: Heh…w….well, you see…

And for Richard's sake, we shall end here.

**THE END**


End file.
